Modern Love

Modern love is the number of the text messages
I receive from you, they say.
If that is somewhat true then
our love exist between the range of hundred to two hundred.

Because that’s the message
we send and receive even on tired Thursday night.

I wish they said love existed
in the response time of text received
because while it took  me whole five minute
to type the message in a crowded train with no space,
yet it took only three seconds  for you to read
another milli-fraction send for you to respond.

In that way our love would have been better than theirs

I wish it never existed in the lines I see in your face every day but
in the shivers to pronounce your name with right syllable.

In that way I could have been better lover than anyone was ever was.

– Abirami Pilai

pic source -dribble



I read someone’s tweet last night,
It was something like this:
“That you sleep next to someone for years and then one day you can’t anymore?”
The author said, he can never understand how that works and honestly even I can’t.

Everyday, I look at people falling in and out of love.
Falling in, it’s a wonderful part but
when they fall out, it breaks my heart every now and then.

Everyday, I look at them and believe in love lesser and less.

Last night, you asked me the same,
I didn’t have any answer for you;
because  I thought there won’t be possibility of one.

If you have to know,
know this.
Everytime, I look at you;
you are little less strange than ever.

And if I could find million reason to love you when I wasn’t looking for one;
guess how much could I find, if I want you to stay.

– Abirami Pillai

Empty Void Spaces

Empty Void Spaces

I get it. All right.
You are filling up your soul, no not your soul; you are trying to fill the void that occurred to you few years ago.
I don’t know how the void came into existence. I honestly don’t know.
Maybe someone walked out of your life or else maybe you didn’t get the love you deserved.
It can be also because life took you somewhere and you didn’t wanted to end up there.
It might be also due to your mistake of your past or fear of future.
Your might be also in waiting for something to arrive or must be tired of waiting forever.
I don’t know why this void came into existence.
But all I know there exist a void inside and you are trying to fill it with all the things you can get hands on.
With music, books, movies, sports, sometimes even with a drink or two.
You are trying to fill as fast as you can with all the things you can avail to.

But if you must know, know this
these empty void spaces inside you
can be only filled up by another human
Cause flesh beholds only flesh, nothing less or nothing more.
And if you are enough lucky
you might eventually find that human
who comes into your life and fill these void
without your permission and take you to whole new reality!

– Abirami Pillai

Passion Of An Old Soul

I am not like other people believe me, I am not ;
I don’t have much but even if I had all the things, I won’t brag about it;
All I do have is my soul and it is alive.
You see my soul, it wants something else.
Something more than meaningless conversation.
It needs something more than temporary people.
It aches for something real and my soul is and always have been old school.
It also knows time changes and people have to change with it but it doesn’t believe in modern love values.
It aches for something passionate that would kill me but also make me feel alive at a same time.
My soul doesn’t settles for ordinary things that’s why every night,
I stay awake lonely and try to make sense  of all the things
in my head, heart , people and sometimes universe.

At times my soul believes there exists people:
Who would love a mixtape from someone,
Who would prefer letters instead of text messages,
Who would love to run on empty beaches barefoot,
Who are little more alive at rather than in daylight,
Who would gaze at stars hopelessly to fall in love with someone, someday,
Who would sing their heart tune even if there is nothing cheerful to sing about,
Who would die for you.
My soul still believes that this kind of people do exist;
And if I keep looking for eventually I will find them or more better I will become like them.
You see these kind of people make the world more alive;These kind of people make more sense to me,

People who come and show to you that even the stars can be counted.
And the only ones worth dying for.

-Abirami Pillai